So Jeff and I celebrated our 20th anniversary this past week. Months back we toyed with the idea to do something far away like St. John's Island or something like that, but to be honest for the past six months trying to get myself to think ahead and plan seemed impossible. We would often talk about what we would want to do together on Monday's during Jeff's day off but as it got closer the more we settled on going to Traverse City in Michigan. This was a town we had hoped to get to on our bike trip in Michigan three years ago, but chose an alternate route due to weather. We decided to book a hotel room for the first night and then just wing it from there.
So this was the week to celebrate. We left on Wednesday morning right on time, heading north. We enjoyed some good conversation, a little shopping and lunch on the way. We found Traverse City to be a neat area with lots of shopping, cafes, beachfront - all very touristy though. In the evening we decided to take a drive up the Old Mission Penisula to see the sunset from that side. We drove past lots of big homes on the Bay and a lot of orchards. The next morning we both sat out by the water doing some reading and enjoying the calm of the morning. From here we had no set direction. I had really wanted to see some of the Lelanau Penisula and I knew that there was a bike trail heading north, so my dear husband so graciously parked and got the bikes ready for the ride. It was a nice trail to ride on but eventually it wasn't paved and we decided to not keep going so we turned back around and finished the tour in the vehicle. Again, we enjoyed a little cafe in Suttons Bay and some good views of the Bay on the east side and then Lake Michigan on the west side. We had decided to not return to Traverse City that night and to find something on the coast to again see a good sunset. We took a little break in the afternoon to enjoy Sleeping Bear Dunes, doing some hiking and sightseeing. By 5:00 we arrived at Frankfort and decided to stay the night there. This was our favorite location. A small town, a walk to everything - shops, food, beach. We got some pizza and ate it along the harbor with the boats and swans to watch. We headed then towards the beach area and walked out a pier to the lighthouse and then found our way to another less traveled pier to watch the sunset.
The next morning I went out exploring on my own while Jeff did some reading. I rode bike to the next town, Elberta, and then found a great bike trail that was at points along a river. That was a highlight for me, discovering a new area, a great morning ride and some quiet and beautiful sights. We found this area to be so refreshing. We had a recommendation to visit a few places that turned out to be our favorites - Trick Dog cafe, drinking an Italian soda, iced green tea and an apricot scone; Gwen Frostic studio - a place that was so inspiring seeing her artwork of nature, the layout of the building-embracing the natural setting it was in and enjoying reading a bit about her life and some of her books; then took a canoe ride on the river for a couple of hours - listening to the birds and enjoying the time in nature (we didn't see any signs of people until right at the end).
So while we enjoyed our time together discovering new things it was a good reminder to me of how important it is to spend time together. That it really goes beyond just being together - I think we all know how to co-exist and keep things functioning on the day to day. What I wasn't prepared for was the mix of emotions that would come up for me throughout the week.
Recently at a seminar on marriage at the Pittsburgh convention a few points resonated with me this week, such as, "intimacy exposes things in myself (good & bad) that we need to face" and we need to "be willing to feel the hard emotions". One would think that on an anniversary trip that it would be all happy and exciting. It was those emotions but it was also sad and lonely at times. Why are relationships so challenging and rewarding? Why is being real so emotional and yet draw you closer? I just read a book talking about finding your passion and purpose in life. On the journey one needs to go through a preparing, planting, growth and then harvest stage. On this journey you need to press through the trials to reach the harvesting stage and for many it's easier to get out and never experience the true joy. Same is true in relationships. It is about being vulnerable, being respectful, honoring the other, willingness to let go of some things (fears) and choosing to stay facing each other along the way.
While most of my "stuff" this week was my own personal stuff I am grateful for a husband who I never question whether he will choose to stay, whether he will love, honor and respect me. And that is what keeps this marriage thriving, not just surviving. For each day I am grateful, for each year I am amazed that the love keeps growing deeper and I look forward to all that is to come! I love you Jeff!!
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